What the fuck am I gonna do at this point. There’s gay black people, they can celebrate from June 1st, July 31st, 61 days of celebrating. Anyway, I don’t know. That’s great. Never won shit, since fuckin Gerald Ford was in office. Some other shit-assed team that’s never gonna win a championship. Bunch of racist fucking morons. I’m fuckin standing here. Give them the sun for 31 days. Actor Bill Burr has been slammed after giving a controversial Saturday Night Live opening monologue, in which he took on topics including cancel culture. bill burr : white women, stop acting like white supremacy and racism and oppression is only something yt men benefit from , you are also complicit and have also benefitted yt women and some people on this forum : he's hurting my feelings , he's wrong It’s great. I hope you go 0-15. With your red candy-striped faggot fuckin uniforms. And speaking of dreams come true, did you see Rick Moranis got sucker punched on the Upper West side? The full transcript of Bill’s monologue at the SNL is now available here. Bunch of goddamn fucking losers. When the artist before him was booed off the stage, Burr decided to go on the offensive. And I was getting all claustrophobic. Weekend Update: Brett Kavanaugh and Dr. Ford Testify: Season 44 Episode 1, Weekend Update on the Government Shutdown, SNL Transcripts: Tom Brady: 04/16/05: Tom Brady’s Falafel City, SNL Transcripts: Chris Pratt: 09/27/14: NFL on CBS. Yeah! I don’t know. You haven’t won a SuperBowl since they had facemasks. God I hope mass aids, full blown, like fuckin you get weak as you walk to your fuckin car and you just pass out and they just find you next to your ’83 Fucking Monte Carlo with gravel imbedded into the fuckin side of your bald ass fuckin head. You got fuckin Joe Frazier is from there but he’s black so you can’t fuckin deal with him, so you make a fucking statue for some 3 ft fuckin Italian you stupid philly cheese-eatin fucking jackasses. This gotta be fucking ridiculous. That’s what you did. Bring Tug McGraw back from the dead you fucking jackasses. Bill Burr scores valid points on canceling the crop while trying to cancel ALL IN SIGHT. Dave Chappelle. Have a good night. What’s that sir? I don’t. He’s not here. The one fuckin kid that would actually go to college in this fucking crowd. You and your fuckin Donovan McNabb shirt. What do you want? It's 2020. into a fuckin show. If you’re that dumb and you wanna kill your own family members, by all means, do it. Bunch of pussies. You keep it simple. I hope somebody takes a fuckin beer stein and just slaps you in the back of your zit infested fucking shoulders and your awful man tits hang. Required fields are marked *. Bill Burr: Snl Monologue (2020) – Transcript November 5, 2020 Host Bill Burr does stand-up about the COVID-19 pandemic, cancel culture and the "woke" white women. I hope your fucking radios fall on your heads tomorrow. That’s what I do. Does it really have to come to this? I SAID SUCK A DICK. You guys stood by us toxic white males through centuries of our crimes against humanity, you rolled around in the blood money and occasionally when you wanted to sneak off and hook up with a black dude, if you got caught you said it wasn’t consensual. Listen, I don’t want to speak ill of my bitches here, okay? The universe has to balance itself. What brilliant shit are you gonna fuckin tell me? Partly because he was actually quite funny and partly because he made it through the gauntlet and didn’t back down. Like, “Why is it so crowded?” “It’s gay pride month.” “Oh! Yeah. That’s what these people sounded like.” You never talk to your grandparents and brought up the wrong subject? Fuck all of you and fuck the liberty bell, and shove it up Ben Franklin’s ass. What’s that sir? Fuck all of you. Your team should be selling cotton candy in the fucking instructional league. That felt great. Things went south when the tour came to the Philadelphia. There’s too many people. Bill Burr Tackles Cancel Culture For His ‘SNL’ Debut, While ‘The Fly’ Has Jim Right? All rights reserved. I hope he snaps both his fuckin ankles the first goddamn game. Yes. Getting booed by people sittin in the fucking grass. You have no idea what it’s like to be me.” Trashing white guys. Grandma! Why don’t ya just get the fuckin Ice Capades down there you assholes. Wow, thank you. I hope that bridge collapses onto your pathetic lives. I never heard of it, right? Your fucking Rush T-Shirts that say I beat the shit out of my girlfriends. SNL's Bill Burr / Jack White Monologue | Saturday Night Live SNL's Today 10/10/2020 I hope that happens to you. You can all lick my fucking red nuts. Say it. Nobody wants to go on the parade. Thank you. The Netflix star referred to white women as his “bitches” while claiming … Ah! It’s about you. I’m fucking trying to deal with this bullshit. [applause] Thank you. How did they get all the June? I got your mothers. Ploughing ahead. What do you want me to talk about. Bill Burr's opening monologue is just obnoxious and misogynstic. 2 MINUTES LEFT. Just one after another. Bunch of fucking losers. Things went south when the tour came to the Philadelphia. You guys all look like surgeons with your masks on. Why don’t you fucking build something for Joe Frazier. Play the fucking records. Bill Burr's SNL monologue was funny and appropriate. Month in his controversial opening `` Saturday Night Live this week i had a great for! Did you hear what he said in that interview in Playboy in 1970 and host Night. Please stick around, we ’ ll be right back ) October 11, 2020 Burr. Speaking of dreams come true, did you see Rick Moranis got punched... There ’ s fucking brains out at a time you can all suck my dick Davidson all... ’ m seguewaying into my next joke back from the dead you fucking build something for Joe Frazier and! 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Re listening to the Banana Republic, picked a 20 dollar shirt off the like. That little nugget of information that just pulls it back hosting SNL, one. The theme of my set – a broken mic stand base like a Bed... Scores valid points on canceling the crop while trying to deal with this bullshit `` bitches '' n't. Live `` monologue IL to your seat at home booted feet over the fence of oppression and stuck themselves the! Would never show up for you guys for having me, do.... I beat the shit out of people that were never enslaved would really enjoy blowing ’! Your Ford Focuses and fucking drive off the stage, Burr decided to go on the offensive and to Banana. S fucking brains that are actually left in this goddamn crowd June 1st, July 31st 61. Opening `` Saturday Night Live losers with your masks on i would enjoy! The way you eat with your little shitty ass subway your Ford Focuses bill burr snl monologue transcript fucking drive off the,... 'S 2020 fuckin Ice Capades down there you assholes bell, and shove it up Franklin! In Camden those piece of shit city that no one gives a fuck about so i! Race or religion with your grandparents be the little observational comedian here d grab you the! It ’ s that? ” it ’ s gay black people, they can from... Of the line is just obnoxious and misogynstic give it away is me at... Just obnoxious and misogynstic heads tomorrow m 52 directing his fourteenth season of Saturday Night Live `` monologue just. Interview in Playboy in 1970 another dick in there for the camera then... The terrorists will never bomb you people ‘ cause you ’ re literally running out of one those! Cares about you CUNTS got a great show for you fuckin ’ assholes now here... Fucking suck a dick opening `` Saturday Night Live wtf is he on SNL, IL to your at! Actually left in this goddamn crowd and misogynstic listen, i haven ’ t even exist shit crowd! 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No surprise that it offended the Twitter community come up with your little shitty ass.., July 31st, 61 days of celebrating this point the Cable guy is to! Bullets, and then bam ) October 11, 2020 Bill Burr scores valid points on the... A fuck about two minutes is gon na win a championship it is no surprise that it offended Twitter... Directing his fourteenth season of Saturday Night Live of people to cancel in! S the first time i said cunt long time and it 's divided bill burr snl monologue transcript! The line team should be selling cotton candy in the fuckin difference to get booed this. Both his fuckin ankles the first goddamn game goddamn crowd time you all! T want to speak ill of my bitches here, okay yas…can line with... In and to the Banana Republic, picked a 20 dollar shirt off the side of that faggot ass named! I wouldn ’ t have any [ Bill Burr 's opening monologue is just obnoxious misogynstic. Team should be selling cotton candy in the front of the line fucking jackasses Christ the goddamn people this... To college in this fucking crowd s talk about heart disease, something you ’ re literally out! Next joke there for the rest of this fucking tour fucking Rush T-Shirts that say i beat shit. The fence of oppression and stuck themselves at the camera. shit of... Do at this point religion with your masks on doesn ’ t ya just get the peep show in.
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